Document Type

Article

Publication Date

2017

Abstract

When we think of hospitality, we usually think of sharing food, but our words to one another can also be a form of hospitality.

When food is shared, we sit around a table, give people our best from the kitchen and invite conversation. Guests feel welcomed when the host is warm, attentive to their comfort, and is more interested in learning about them than about expounding on his or her own life and ideas. Host and guests become friends when the guests experience a warm connection and feel the dignity of being cared for graciously.

Words are like food. The hospitality of words is the suspension of judgment and exclusion. It’s the invitation to connection and shared meaning. When we come together around a social table, we want to introduce ourselves with our own name. We want the dignity of naming ourselves so that we tell the story of who we are. African Americans and First Nations people have named themselves and have rejected the white persons naming with all its prejudice and history. As a woman and for many women like me, we would also like to hear our name, the name given us by God. We are women. We do not want our name hidden within other namings.

When we use terms like ‘man’ or ‘mankind’ to mean ‘all people,’ we are implying, if even unconsciously, the ‘covering’ term for whoever is at the head of the table. Such words create the perception that the male is the normalized presence, and the female is included under or subsumed within that norm. In addition, when the term ‘man’ is used, it means that women have always to interpret the context of whether they are included or not. If women have to interpret the meaning, the word ‘man’ is actually an awkward gesture, hospitably speaking.

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Originally published at https://missioalliance.org/hospitality-words/

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